Saturday, November 28, 2009

Oh Subconcious, why must you mock me so...

This is what I've wanted and it's happening here, now. Sweet merciful Christ. I can feel tears of happiness springing to my eyes. I'm joyous. My heart feels like it's going to explode. All the pain, frustration, confusion is wiped clean with a few simple sentences. The wait has paid off. The time has come today (young hearts will go their way). My mind races with the possibility of things to come. In all my life, I've never felt such excitement for the future, never so high.

It's dark. I'm alone in my bed.

Oh No. No. Dammit, no. NO.

I remember the scene and pick out details, all the little details that didn't quite make sense.

Yes. *sigh*

Close my eyes, try to sleep. I want to go back, I want to go back.

Returning to sleep I'm rewarded only with a bizarre mishmash of images and scenarios that can only be described as odd.

A friend's former flame asks if he can 'call' me - I am conflicted.

Picking my children up from their dads, the couple that used to live there are creating a fantasy world out of Legos. There's a popular sitcom playing on the television, but today's episode features hardcore nudity (and No, it's not The Simpsons) so I try and shield the childrens eyes and hurry them out.

I'm in a Zellers, and having made one small purchase, I try to bypass the huge crowds by going through the vestibule to get to the registers, and I am stopped and accused of 'stealing' a Discman that is A) quite obviously used and B) a good ten years old. I'm told to pay for it despite my argument that I've not only bought it somewhere else, that I also bought it second-hand. The other employees cheer as the first berates me.

The narrative is sketchy, at best. Haw Haw Haw.

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