Friday, May 10, 2013

Come to think of it, I'd probably forgo shaving, too. #Revolution

Since its inception, The Well-Travelled One and I have been pretty regular viewers of Revolution, the dystopian-future drama set 15 years after a human-made disaster wipes out almost all electricity (and for some reason, combustion engines, because why not?) and the world, especially North America, goes to shit.

Like, I said, Dystopian.

Without giving away too many spoilers, last night after many many episodes worth of almost non-stop gratuituous violence, we FINALLY got to see a little sex.  Not a lot, because I'm pretty sure this is a network show and not HBO.  I make this assumption due to the fact that for a future where people are getting slaughtered left, right and center, there's surprisingly little cussing.  Graphic violence in multitudes is cool, but please, no cussing or hint of side-boob, right NBC?

So a couple of characters who will remain unnamed ended the episode by engaging in some implied naked fun time.

This morning I got to thinking.. if I were living in a dystopian future would there be any purpose to wearing a bra?  I'm thinking no.  At least not for me.  I know there are women who HAVE to wear bras, otherwise face massive discomfort, so I'm not about to begrudge more endowed ladies their undergarments, even when the world is going to hell in a handbasket.

As my friend Nic pointed out, all that running from zombies, robots, authorities etc. could very well make some kind of support a necessity, in which case I'd probably settle for binding myself instead of oh.. I don't know.. MATCHING BRA AND PANTY SETS?  Somehow I think if my life was constantly under threat, I'd not care much what my underpants looked like, and would be more worried about not constantly shitting them every time someone was trying to kill me.

Like how Aaron looks 90% of the time he's on screen.
Where in a dystopian future with no electricity where our heroes are consistently on the run from forces that would see them dead, does {redacted for spoilers} get a fucking matching Victoria Secret bra and panty set?

Did she sew them herself?

In the immortal words of Sweet Brown, "Ain't nobody got time for that."

Are they shipped by steamships from sweatshops that have gotten even sweatier since the lights (and thus the air conditioning.. because sweatshops totally have THAT) went off?  How the hell would they get to her?  The main protagonists are ALWAYS ON THE MOVE.  CONSTANTLY.

And NOBODY is going to convince me that these are they same underoos she's had for the last fifteen years.  The show is set in 2027, so she'd have to have bought them last year, in 2012 at the latest.  I'm a buyer of underpants and a purchaser of brassieres, and the shit that gets manufactured and sold in stores in present-day North America is NOT made to withstand 15 years of fighting, killing, running, plotting and the occasionally beating against a rock to launder them.  She would have stabbed herself with the underwire a thousand times over by now.

I guess in an electricity-void, dystopian future where hair always looks conditioned, EXIT signs in building still glow red and people inexplicably drink whiskey from late 19th-century antique glass bottles in spite of the fact that their 15-year-old empty Canadian Club 26ers would probably work just as well, a little bit of realism when it comes to the characters gotchies is probably too much to ask.


5 comments:

  1. Eh, you're trying to instill too much reality into the dystopian fantasy. That way lies madness. Let's face it - there's a LOT of off-screen trivialities that go on, including (but not limited to) looting some old Vicky's Secret stores in the local mall for suitable underthings. Best to let all that go, and enjoy the narrative as best you can.

    Also, yes, it's on NBC, and yes, I was suitably surprised when some shenanigans FINALLY jumped off.

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  2. Brilliant. I have never considered the reality of underpants in the apocalypse.

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  3. yes. I would WANT the bra.. but it would be pretty feckin' yellowed, my guess. And most likely stretched out from all the running. And BIG girl panties,... the most comfiest, streamlined for speed ones. Most likely with frayed and unravelling elastics, and a tear in the crochal area.

    You know whut I'm sayin.

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  4. I have written an entire blog post about how I hoard matching bra and panty sets, yet I have never given thought to making sure they are included in a survival kit. Thank you so much for making me realize they need to be priority one. I'm guessing sexy times are rare in dystopian futures. A girl needs to be prepared.

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  5. Thanks so much for the non-spoilage. I have last night's episode on DVR. Just this week I was complaining about the long flowing tresses on Revolution. Also on medical shows. If the ME needs goggles, gloves, and a gown, WTF is she doing with her hair down?

    I would probably need something to harness the girls, but underwire, lace, silky? No way.

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