2015 Resolutions: Quarter One Report, Part 1 aka the Creative Stuff.

We're coming up to the end of March and as expected, after a couple weeks of lovely almost-springish weather, the temperature is taking a nosedive because Mother Nature likes to celebrate April Fools' Day early.

Back in January I wrote a post where I made some promises to myself for the New Year.  I thought it might be fun to revisit that post and see where I find myself at the end of Q1. 

(Yes, I work in a businessy-type-field so I use terms like Q1 and ROI and other bizness-speak sometimes)

Let's review, shall we?

1) Be More Active.  - I'm actually doing somewhat well with this.  I've been faithfully going to the Y three days a week and averaging about 16-20 pool lengths for each roughly 25 minute workout.  I'm having a hell of a time getting there earlier than 8am, which kind of puts a limit on how long I can work out, so I try to push myself for those 25 minutes.

I also returned to kick-boxing and have not missed a Monday workout thus far.  It's been a challenge.  I'm not going to lie, I'm probably about 30-40 lbs heavier than I was when I stopped going (a couple months before I got my diagnosis and I was feeling shitty all the time) so getting used to the way my body moves and what it can and can no longer do.

It's frustrating in many ways.  For instance, I've developed fat-girl ankles, which basically mean they don't hold up to high-impact (like skipping, running) like they used to.  They get sore and achy.  The first couple workouts my calves seized up, much like the did when I played with Reagan's basketball league.

Room for Improvement:  Nicer weather is coming, so I need to get my iPod or other digital music thingie loaded up and get out walking on my lunch breaks and/or after dinner.  Hiking season comes fast.

2) The Penis Table.  - I'm going to give myself a pass on this one.  It's winter and I lack facilities with the proper ventilation to adequately deal with stripper and paint fumes.

3) Blog More. - I started off kind of strong in the beginning on this one, but kind of dwindled, from 7 posts on this blog in January, down to 2 in March (not including this one).   I blame a cycle of 'Nothing going on, nothing to write about' mixed with 'too much going on, no time to write.'

The art blog had a similar decline in posts: 5 in January, 4 in February, and 3 in March.  The two roadblocks I'm having can be summed up by the following:

• I'm only posting finished projects.  I currently have three projects on the go, plus at least two more I want to start.
• I'm hesitant to post some of the older stuff, mainly because A) I've been doing a lot of fixes and re-dos, so I hold off posting older works in case I decide to rework them, and B) Some of the old stuff is kind of terrible and I'm frankly a little embarrassed.

Room for Improvement: I pretty much just gotta make more time, or make peace with one or both of these blogs getting a little neglected while I try to do other things.

4) Paint. Draw. Craft. - Bragging time, because I've been a goddamned VIKING in this area.  As I mentioned, I've got a number of projects on the go, and I've been getting a good 2-3 hours in some weeks of creative time.

I entered another painting in a local show, and was once again skunked, so that was a set-back, but I'm going to keep trying and also check out some shops that deal in local art.

5) Write. - To quote Jon Stewart: "I don’t have any specific plans, just a lotta ideas, a lotta things in my head."  I may or may not have some paragraphs and sentences saved in various files on my computers, that could one day blossom into something more substantial.

6) Make Music. - Yeah, I kind of let this one slide. I'm getting out of practice, no lie. I did make it to one open mic, the saturday afternoon one at the MCC.  It's a busy one, though, and you only get two songs per set, which seems like... well, you're just hitting your stride.  Three makes more sense.  One to warm up, a second one for redemption, and a third one to kick ass at.

7) Audition for Plays. - There were some auditions a few weeks ago.  I found out the morning of, so I missed it.  My kid is in a play, though.  Does that count?

Stay Tuned for Part 2...

Humility is for suckers.

I got called out yesterday morning by a friend I hadn't talked to for a while.  I fully deserved it.  It was in regards to a facebook post I had made for a recent post on the art blog.

He pointed out that I seem to preface every post with a negative comment about my work.

Fair enough.

Not having ingested enough coffee at the time, I thought this observation to be mainly in reference to the blog post itself, which being a post about one of my first painting attempts, I thought was critical but fair.

It hadn't occurred to me that on the Facebook post, I had included the words "Be prepared for terribleness."

Okay, that's pretty negative.

Although I created the art blog with the intent of sharing more of the stories behind my artwork, I also wanted it to be a place where I could examine and critique my own work:  where I've improved and where I'd like to see improvement.

But I'm not going to lie. I tear myself down, a lot.  I've been using self-deprecation as a defense mechanism for a ridiculously long time, and it's a tough habit to break.

I know there one major thing at play here: there is the desire to point out my own flaws before anyone else can.  It's as though if I don't let anyone see that I might actually be taking this somewhat seriously, then I don't have to live up to the expectation of being any good at it.  It's the thing that keeps me referring to myself as a dabbler, or a hobbyist, as opposed to an artist.  I feel like if I act like I take it too seriously, then I'm at risk at becoming the living embodiment of the insufferably pretentious art snob.  So I fall back on "Ha ha, I suck."

I've always felt rather mediocre at most of my endeavours.  Perhaps I've only ever been mediocre because I won't allow myself to immerse myself in anything enough to be more than 'just okay' because if I do, then there will be expectations.

And let's face it.  Pride is still considered, in many circles, to be a vanity, a sin.  Women especially are expected to downgrade their accomplishments, to deflect compliments with phrases like "Oh, you don't mean that," and "You're just saying that to be nice." 


It's bullshit. The idea that people should be humble, should not draw attention to their strengths, is a great way to keep people down, to keep them from realizing their full potential.  We don't know the things we are capable of if a fear of pride or appearing immodest drives us to downplay every single accomplishment we have.  We internalize the message that those things we learn and do and become good, great, or even experts at (outside, of course, of those things we do to earn money, because capitalism.. you are your job, in this system) don't matter, that they aren't a big deal.

You, my friends, are a big fucking deal.  If you tried something new today, that's a big deal.  If you did something today that you love and did it even the teensiest bit better than you did yesterday, that's a big deal.

From today, I am going to try to work extra hard not to be so self-deprecating when it comes to my art, my music, my writing or myself.  I am a big fucking deal.

SOURCE

Rejection. Frustration.

So it's Thursday night and the opening for the gallery exhibition I had entered my painting in takes place tomorrow night. I have not yet heard if my piece was accepted.

I'm thinking I'm skunked again.

Sigh.

I'm feeling kind of sorry for myself, I will admit.  Just bums me out.  When I dropped it off, I got a look at some of the other submissions and immediately felt overwhelmed and kind of out of my league.

The Well-Travelled one tried to cheer me up by reminding me that a lot of the people who submit to these things have been painting and otherwise making art for years and sometimes decades, many of them having a formal educational background to boot.

This area, being a small, relatively close-knit area I have to wonder if there isn't a certain level of clique-ishess where those who have been active in the community get preferential treatment.  It's the same feeling I get with the theatre folk around here.

However, it's entirely possible that I looking for mini-conspiracies and nepotism in a misguided attempt at making myself feel better and stop berating myself for being a mediocre talent at best.  Jerkbrain is a jerk, and rejection just seems to feed the beast.

Meh.

As pointed out to me in another well-intentioned attempt by the Well-Travelled one to assuage my self-flaggellation in the face of defeat, at least this has been a bit of a learning experience.  I now know a few things I didn't before, such as turnaround time for custom framing, and where to buy my own damn frames.  I even know how to frame my own canvases now, so I guess that's something?

Bah. 

Still sucks.

SOURCE

This was my weekend.. how was yours?

Things seem to finally be settling down around here, after Christmas, New Year's and the flu that worked its way around the household and made the holidays less than spectacular.

This weekend was a quiet one, mostly due to the weather and the kids being at their dads.  After a somewhat frustrating day at work, I got home with the intention of doing sweet eff-all for the evening, which I did, with GUSTO.

The Well-Travelled One whipped up a quick dinner for us, and I played a few rounds of Hatris (like Tetris, but with hats!) and marathoned several episodes of Friends.  I've been rewatching the series since I got sick around the middle of December and am up to season five now.  It's kind of laughable how dated some episodes seem now, especially the giant cordless phones of the early 90s.

I haven't really seen many really good non-workplace and non-family half hour sitcoms since then.  The most recent ensemble cast I can say I've thoroughly enjoyed is probably New Girl, but sometimes the overlapping dialogue gets grating.

Saturday we were going to go to Barrie but I was thwarted by both a late start and intermittent white-outs, so we opted instead for going for coffee, after which I went to my counselling appointment.  The woman I see is probably in her late 80s and is just absolutely fantastic. However, she works out of her home, which is way out in the sticks, down a very windy road that swings around the lake.  The road gets quite treacherous in the winter. 

After an extended session, I came home, had dinner and finished a reworking of a portrait that I have been working on.  I'm pretty damn excited about how it turned out, and will be posting about it on the art blog this week.

Today, we had an earlier start and made it down to Barrie so I could look for some framing options, as I am planning to enter a piece of mine into a local art show.  They are kind of picky about display options, and any canvas art less than 1.5 inches wide is required to be framed.

Earlier in the week I looked into custom framing at a local place, but being one of the only places in town, they were wildly over-booked, so I figured I'd try Michaels.  It's funny.. local places suffer from competition from chain stores and end up carrying less stock, and in turn, because they carry less stock, people end up looking to big chain stores.

At any rate, Michaels' was not much help, as there was a two-week turnaround for custom work, and I have until.. well.. tomorrow, as that is the submission date.  I had pretty much decided not to bother since I wouldn't have time. 

We stopped at a computer store so he could pick some stuff up, and I decided to check out Curry's, which is just a few doors down.

I'm pretty sure I've found my happy place.  Either that, or I've found my "Holy Crap Get Me Out Of Here Before I Spend Next Month's Rent Place."  Anyway, to my surprise, I found a collection of reasonably-prices floating frames, along with the hardware.  Huzzah! I may have a chance to enter after all.

I picked out a nice, unfinished frame and some hardware, along with a few brushes and a couple more tubes of paint, excited to come home and try my and at framing this piece for the show.  I just hope that I get in.

My final product.

Wherein I extend on an already rambling Facebook status

So, I've been running the art blog for about a week now, and it's created this weird paradox of motivation wherein the blogging motivates me to paint more, while the painting has motivated me to blog more.. Not only on the new blog, but on this blog as well.

I've been reviewing a lot of my old work, and revising some of it, taking the time to really put care into details and not rush to finish a picture all in one night.  There are a lot of pieces I feel like I could have done better had I taken more time.  Others are just kind of horrendous to me now, and I'm not sure whether I want to try and fix them or hide them away forever, never to be seen again.

I'm finding myself with the urge to REVISE ALL THE THINGS and go back and touch up old paintings.  That's not cheating is it? I mean, if writers can go back and edit old manuscripts, I can go back and use what I've learned (mostly slow the eff down) to fix and improve what I've already created.. That's not a bad thing.. Right?

The current work in progress is one I did some time ago.  I reached a point where although I knew it wasn't "done," I had hit a point where I really liked what I had done so far, and was nervous to go any farther lest I manage to fuck up what had been, at the time, a very challenging piece for me.

I've pulled it back out and after much hemming and hawing about whether I really wanted to mess with it, I've gone back in.

It is so worth it.  I am really, excruciatingly excited.

I'm not dead, but unlike Mr. Scott Weiland, I may or may not be for sale.

So, I'm not suicidal. In case anyone was wondering. I deactivated my Facebook account last week and the first thing The Well Travelled One warned me was to expect cops to show up, since apparently deleting your Facebook is considered a sign that someone is suicidal. Apparently it's a sign of being a terrorist or weirdo or something too. I have seen news stories to this effect, but am too tired and or lazy to link them.

You know who else didn't have a Facebook account? Hitler.

This actually concerned me a bit since I also took a hiatus from my kick-boxing classes for health related reasons.. It might have looked I really was withdrawing..

"I guess this would be a bad time to start selling my shit on Kajiji, right? Heh."

Anyway, I'm doing fine. Rediscovering methods of communication such as... The phone!! Holy crap. I kind of forgot that I have a pretty spectacular long distance plan.

In other news...

Painting. Renewed my efforts on a piece I started almost two years ago. It's a reproduction of a photo that the Well-Travelled one had taken on one of his adventures. I had left it alone for sometime out of frustration at my inability to paint a straight line.

Masking tape is a grand, grand invention. Except that I lost my masking tape so I had to use invisible tape. You know what sucks about invisible tape?

IT'S FUCKING INVISIBLE.

So that makes for a fabulous time trying to tell where you actually taped and didn't tape.

I'm harbouring a house full of pre- adolescent and adolescent girls. There has been much giggling and much sounds that indicate that the ceiling is probably three seconds from caving in.

It's not so bad though. I can't speak for tomorrow though, as I have been waking up with nasty, possibly sinus related headaches the last few days. Hopefully I will be able to handle the onslaught of girl noise come morning.

Holding myself accountable.. that's what this is about, right?

So, I haven't done an MFP monday (formerly WWWednesday) post in a while.  Mainly because I figured that after a few weeks of "Gained xxx number of lbs." or "Stayed the same.  I don't want to talk about it." would get old after a while.

The progress has been slow going, to say the least.  Although my ticker says I'm down 2lbs, as of two or three days ago, I was pretty much where I started.  I've just not been tracking gains, only losses.  Once I'm down below my recorded weight, I'll start updating again.  It just got so frustrating seeing that 0 on my ticker.

I had a week that I thought I did well, and stayed the same.  Then I had a pretty good week but fell apart on the weekend and ended up gaining two pounds.  Then I kind of went off the rails and said 'fuck it!' for a few days.  As you may guess, this was pretty easy considering it was halloween and I had all sorts of candy and chips at my disposal.  However I think hormones played into my fluctuations because then I was down 4lbs.. then up 2 and so on..

So now I'm thinking of weighing in tomorrow morning but I know I'm going to be frustrated as fuck if there is no happy change in the numbers. How the hell did I deal with all this the first time around?  I had so much more to lose then, but it seemed to come off much easier, then.

Oh well.

In other news, my NaNoWriMo progress is.. well.. stilted I guess.  I'm up to 2600ish words and at this point I think I'm supposed to be somewhere in five digits.  But every time I sit down to write I find I'd rather write here.  The story I'm writing is semi-autobiographical and through it I'm trying to work out a lot of shit in my head, mainly regarding some past relationships.

I'm getting in the mood to be crafty again, even in spite of the sewing machine disaster of this past weekend.  Through Freecycle I was able to procure some old cuckoo clocks and parts which means lots of GEARS and SPRINGS!! I plan to try and play around with some Steampunk type stuff.. frames and such.

The downside of these clocks is that they smell like they've spent the last 20 years in an unventilated room with someone who insisted on chain-smoking and exhaling directly into the box where they were being stored.  I think I'll be sure to avoid offerings from this user in the future.  Should be pretty easy, his emails were covered in crucifix images and Biblical verses.  I won't miss that.

The girls want me to fix one of them up as an actual clock.  I may try it.  There's one that has the yodelling guys that come out and walk around in a circle and then go back into the clock again.

I tried to take some pictures with my phone, but it's a loaner that I got from Rogers while they fix mine and I'm having trouble figuring out how to send pics.  Oh and the kids broke MY camera.  So y'all may have to just use your imagination on this one.

Little freakin' heathens.

I have an axe to grind..

.. okay, so it's more of a hatchet.

Started on my yard work today after a miscommunication resulted in my afternoon opening up.  A whack of smaller trees on the back of the property fell down so Reegs and I spent an hour or so dragging the broken limbs over to the fire pit.  Unfortunately, some of the fallen branches are too thick for me to break down into smaller chunks by hand, so I'll need to chop them.  Right now my rusty little hatchet is about as threatening as a Nerf bat.

I also managed to fashion a working leaf rake out of the two leaf rakes that got broken last fall, due to neglect.  So I'm a handy-freakin' woman.  I've also managed to make banana muffins, a big batch of spaghetti sauce and completed a backdrop for Tee's play for school.  They're doing 50 Below Zero, based on the book by Robert Munsch and needed a background for the outdoor scene.  Since I'm pretty sucky on that whole 'volunteer-parent' thing, I thought "Hey, this is somewhere I can contribute!"

I don't mind saying, I'm pretty pleased with how it turned out.

So the moral of the story, I should let the kids have friends over more often, because when they're occupied, I get shit DONE.

I welcomed back clothesline season by doing about six thousand loads of laundry.  Two weeks worth of clothes, plus two loads of sheets and a couple of comforters.  I've even got lunches ready to go for tomorrow.  I have to call the insurance company tomorrow to see what the freakin' deal is with my car, because it's been over two weeks and I'm still driving the rental around.

Unexpected visit from the most recent ex, who was in the area visiting friends.  It was.. pleasant.  I dunno, for the first time since everything really went to shit, I felt like we might actually be able to maintain a friendship.. one that doesn't fuck with me emotionally but rather one where we really are just friends, nothing else.

I've been blogwarded by Bruce at Just Another Day In Paradise

I recently came to the conclusion that my blog suffers a bit of an identity crisis as it does not know whether it wants to be a humour blog, a feminist blog, a mommy blog, a music blog, a creative writing/poetry blog or what.  I'm pretty all over the place.  But if others want to call that 'versatile' well who am I to correct them, right?  So thanks Bruce!

The Rules:

7 randoms about me.  These get harder to come up with.  I've also found this in conversation.. being prevalent on the interwebs means I have no material for face-to-face conversations and small talk.

"Did I tell you I...?"  "Yeah, you blogged/posted on Facebook/tweeted about it last week."

Hoo boy.  Random facts.

1. I think Crocs are great for kids but grown-ups who wear them should be throat-punched.
2. I will use a men's washroom (single-occupancy) if no women's washroom is available, because I refuse to let my bladder be a slave to social condition.
3. About 85% of the women on my mothers side look exactly alike or with variations on the same theme.  You could make a template out of us.
4. My favourite book is Hugh MacLennan's The Watch That Ends the Night.  I read it after seeing an interview with The Tragically Hip where they said that the third verse for the song Courage was basically ripped from that book.
5. I once named a cat Chino Moreno, after the singer for the Deftones

Sorry folks, five is all you get. I'm going to hold off on passing this on too, because I'm tired and I get all worried that A) I'm going to insult someone by leaving them out or B) I may pass this on to someone who is not prepared to take on the awesome responsibility of blog award recipiency.

Taking a page from Lance over at My Blog Can Beat Up Your Blog, I'll leave all y'all with a little tune.  This is a live version of Courage, because I can only get the official video through that stupid Vevo thing that tacks a friggin' 40 second commercial at the beginning.  Besides, watching Gord Downie perform live is usually a thing of beauty.

"You look like a wallet in the street.  You look that good."

half-assedness and artistry

crafting is good for the stress levels so I thought I'd share some of the stuff I've completed lately.

But first!!

Guess what came in the mail today?  I won a blog challenge a week or so ago over a it's never too late to save a hopeless case and today I received, care of one ms. steph gas, this lovely tote bag from her store Rule 42 Inc.  You should go check it out, especially the custom t-shirt bags that I would love to make myself if I wasn't ridiculously intimidated by my sewing machine.  Seriously, it scares the shit out of me.

sexy, no?

I'm pretty stoked that she also addressed me the package with my full name and title, as requested:

click to enlarge.  my thumb is covering my address to prevent stalkers.

In the meantime I've been working on some fun stuff and in honor of the half-assed weekend post, I'll share:

This is a mirror that my friend gave me that had been kicking around her basement for the last four to five years.  It was originally a plain blond wood mirror.  I sanded the frame down and painted it with a bright red acrylic, then decided to do the inside perimeter in black.  I had inteded to do the entire frame red.  Then I used an enamel glass paint to do the zebra stripes in the corners.

It was pretty time-consuming, and I had to do it twice since the first time I used a brush-on varnish instead of a glaze (turns out there's a difference.. who knew?  I know, everyone but me.)  The varnish peeled half of the paint off.  I guess it hadn't quite settled.  So I had to scrub it all off and try again.

The second time around I used a spray-glaze that claimed to dry 'crystal-clear' so I just kind of sprayed the whole thing in this stuff and much to my chagrin, this resulted in a nice frosted-glass mirror that wasn't of much to anyone who actually wanted to, oh, I don't know.. look at themselves.  Out came the Windex and before it dried too much I managed to scrub most of the glaze off the reflected surface.  There's still a bit of a sheen from it though.

Next:

This is the completed frame that I had mentioned doing a few weeks back.  Finding a plain frame was a pain in the ass. I searched the salvation army and finally tried the Dollar stores, as usually they have plain frames in the arts and crafts section.  No luck though, couldn't find them.  So this is kind of a cheap dollar store plastic frame painted red, with black on the interior rim, and polka dots.

I still don't know the photographers name.  I'm thinking my dad might know.

Update:  So I was at the gas station the other day and I saw the guy who took the Betty Boop photo and remembering this entry and my earlier one, I ran up and asked him his name again for the sake of being able to properly credit him for his work.  His name is Corey Ramsbottom and he does a lot of scenic and landscape photography.  Check out his website here.

This one I'm pretty proud of:

Once again, dollar store frame which I happened to find while searching for the frame above, plus paint, and podge, and comic book leavings.  I love the way it turned out and I'm thinking of going back for a few more of these frames, because I'd love to make more of these.

A few weeks ago Facebook had a meme going around where you take the first five people on your friends sidebar (no refreshing!) and they become your team for the Zombie Apocalypse.  I got three of my best friends and two co-workers, whom I happen to like and respect.  Got bored so here's my rendering of my zombie apocalypse team:

I'm third from the left

So that's about all.  I'm off to enjoy the rest of my weekend.

this has been a half-assed weekend post, brought to you by a Simple Dude in a Complex World

Rip-snortin' ass-kickin' Sunday Round-up

Pretty darn good.  That's probably my best way to describe this weekend.  No complaints here.

Friday night I picked up some Sushi for dinner at the local RCSS, and since they've changed the delivery day to Friday, it was very very fresh.  I really want to go out for actual restaurant sushi but I'm good with grocery store grade in the meantime.

Headed down to the Legion for karaoke with mom and Sharon.  Dad was already there for darts.  I haven't been out since before Christmas so I was having some withdrawal.  Ended up having a blast and getting some work out of the deal.  Looks like I might have a gig hosting the karaoke night on my kid-free Fridays.  I go in on the 11th so that Lance, our current KJ can train me on the equipment.  Pretty awesome.  Some extra cash to go towards my house-downpayment-fund for two nights work a month, for being where I might already be any given Friday.  Can't beat that.

Speaking of house hunting, mortgage calculators of the ilk that you find on real estate sites are bullshit, and depressing as hell.  According to the mortgage calculator, I can afford roughly $278 a month for a mortgage (which puts me at about $38,000 for a house.  I can't get a mobile home for that little around here).  I pay $700 bucks a month rent, plus hydro and I am not behind on my bills, and I'm managing to pay down my debt so CLEARLY I can afford more than $278 a month for a mortgage.

So eat me, mortgage calculator.

Back to happier things.  While at the Legion a group of about 10 snowmobilers/cottagers from Strathroy come walking in, most of them around my age (couple older dudes, and at least one paperboy).  My first thought, as one of the youngest available women in the Legion was "Oh! Hello Boys! Happy Birthday to Me!"

Normally I'm about as socially awkward as they come but on Friday, whether it was the beer or just a general sense of well-being and oneness with the world coupled with just feeling like holy-shit-I-am-one-hawt-mamma I was kind of on that night and lapping up the attention, especially from one of the cuter guys, who bought me a beer and asked for a dance.  He was a riot, and we spun and twirled and made clumsy attempts at dipping while his friends hooted and hollered and we all sang along to any given songs.  What a fun bunch they were, and I was feeling full of confidence.

Saturday I got up and went into town to take some clothes to the Salvation army and attempted to find a plain wood frame I to use for this print that I bought at the craft sale I did a few weeks back.  I can't for the life of me remember the photographer's name but if I remember it I will link back. In the meantime, please, no one steal this image, kay?  I'd feel really bad if you did.   'preciate it.  I just want a plain wood frame so I can paint it.  I'm thinking either red with white polka dots, or black with white polka dots.

Got a source now - Corey Ramsbottom Photography

Saturday afternoon I went ice skating with my friend Tessa and her boyfriend and her kids.  My ankles felt like jelly and I think I need to invest in some hockey skates.  I think they'd be more conducive to my skating style than the figure skates I currently have.   We left soon after Tess fell and bruised her arm pretty good, which was unfortunate and quite surprising since Vegas odds would be on me being the one that wiped out, but I miraculously didn't fall once.

Saturday night I grabbed my guitar and headed to the local church for their coffee house night.  I showed up a bit late so as a result I was dead-last on the roster, but I held out and managed to get a few songs in.

Here's what I played:

When I Come Back - NQ Arbuckle and Carolyn Mark (I posted a vid of myself playing this a while back.  You can see it here)

I Make the Dough, You Get the Glory - Kathleen Edwards (I've always kind of considered her a poor-man's Sarah Harmer, but I enjoy this tune a lot.)


Tina's Glorious Comeback - Dan Mangan (Future Husband and Stepfather to my children.  I wish.)

If You're Gonna Be Dumb You Gotta Be Tough - Karen O (This song is fun as hell to play)

Just a little Open Mic Ettiquette 101.  Everyone wants a chance to play.  If the mode number of songs people are playing is four, it might be poor form to play seven,  you know?

Because I was very last on the bill, I was a little late to catch the free show being put on by Run With The Kittens at one of the local restaurants, but I did manage to make it about halfway through their first set.  I've never actually heard of them before, but I found them enjoyable.  Their sound is an odd mix of experimental sounds and blues-based rock.  When I listened to them, all I could think of was the Moldy Peaches tune Downloading Porn with Davo (NSFW people).  Later I found a similarity to catl as well.

Sadly, although a great restaurant, I found the Explorer's Cafe lacking as a live music venue.  Lacking space to move, that is, so I left at the intermission as my claustrophobic tendencies were making me a bit twitchy.

Today was laundry and grocery shopping day.  I met up with my mom and sister at the seventh circle of hell and promtly informed them that I was totally compromising my principles just to hang out with them, because I rarely shop at Wal-Mart if I can avoid it.

Feeling accomplished as I managed to make both Jello and Rice Krispie Squares for the girls lunches. Making them homemade is way cheaper than buying these things. A box of Jello costs about 69 cents and makes around six servings.. a pack of jello cups is about 2.99 and they have four.

With a box of Rice Krispies (4.99), three bags of marshmallows (@1.27 each, so $3.75 let's say) and a half pound of butter (1.50) you can make 4-6 dozen rice Krispie squares.  A box of 8 individually wrapped ones are about 2.99.  Plus by making the stuff, you get around the litterless lunch manifesto of the schools.

Don't get me wrong,  I love the idea of a litterless lunch, and we should all do our parts to cut down on garbage.  But telling a kid to take a granola bar out of it's wrapper and bring it in a container is bullshit.  And I doubt the school is going to come to my house and wash all my bloody plastic containers.  So I tell the girls "No, it's not litterless, but it's still less litter."

Melancholy Wine Soaked Tenderness

Sitting on a friday night, having returned from coffee and friends under streetlamps in parking lots. Glass of chardonnay in hand, I am my own company tonight among other nights. The house is quiet, no gentle snoring from little lungs down the hallway. Pictures remain unpainted but the brushes are there waiting, and the smell of acrylics tempt me to creative endeavour. Longing for visitors, the hour is late. One with whom to share the wine, to reminice of days past and to speculate on those to come. To wrap around in the dim candlelight and speak no more, only to wake to the mid-morning sun, with sheets entangled and heads swimming in white wine and afterglow.

Yesterday's post was pretty heavy...

...and right now I'm tossing around thoughts for a post on mainstream porn and feminism in response to Kissie Catastrophe's post at Ethecofem - basically expanding on some thoughts I posted in the comments section.

So to break up the uber-serious monotony, here's a few random awesome things I've found kicking around the internet.  Some are new, some are things I've known of for some time.

1. Brandon Bird.  I love this guy's artwork.  It's what I wish mine could be, a twisted parfait of surrealism and pop culture.  Since I don't personally celebrate the soul-sucking mindfuck that is Valentines day, part of me really wants to buy the complete set of Law and Order SVU Valentines Cards (sorry, you're going to need to scroll a bit) and have my kids distribute them amongst the other little hooligans in their class.  I'm pretty sure that might warrant a call from their teacher though.
   
2. This Post from Aunt Becky at Mommy Wants Vodka.  I was in tears reading it, especially when I am reminded of how my now-10-year-old nephew, upon entering Junior Kindergarten and discovering the world of literacy, decided to label everything in his room.  In black Sharpie.  His bed.  His Sheets.  His pillow. Everything.  It also reminded me of how up until recently everything I owned seemed to be covered in a layer of stickers, courtesy of my little one (who also seems to have a tearing/ripping/otherwise destroying paper goods fetish.)
   
3. Nirvana-Themed Ballet Flats.  I rarely drool over shoes (okay I sometimes do..  but I rarely trying to mentally justify 80+ bucks for shoes) but these are too freaking cute for words.  This woman's store also has some wicked cool Wonder Woman wedges. Sweet Jesus.
   
4. This friggin van that was in the parking lot at work today:
   
   
   Is that not one freaking sweet flame job?  Do you think they paid for that?  Or do you think the guy got a stencil and did it himself (or herself, let's be fair).
   

In other news, the mirror I was given to recondition is coming along nicely, but I have to lament the lack of a decent craft and/or art supply store in the vicinity.   Michael's is a good 35 minutes away, and that pretty much leaves the Quest Art Gallery, which has limited selection, or Wal-Mart, which is.. well.. you all know my opinion on Wal-Mart.  Plus there's still a lot of stuff they don't have either.  So yeah, travelling for art supplies is crap.  But my mirror is going to look awesome.  Will post pics when done.  I wish I had thought to get a picture before i started this project.

This is going to be a quickie...

My days are all messed up.

Seriously, I was doing a quick post and I almost declared it a Half-Assed Weekend post, then I remembered it was Wednesday. Sweet Jebus, do I ever love being on holidays.

I got the call today that my ticket to the Dominican Republic all ready to be picked up. Oh yes, one sun and alchohol fuelled week with two of my best friends. Happy Belated 30th Birthday to me because really, who wants to go to the DR in AUGUST? You go in JANUARY so you can laugh at all the people who are stuck in here in -30 Canadian winter weather. Suckahs.

Went thrift-store shopping with my mom and sister today and it was fabulous. I had not one but two OMG experiences. I bought a pair of jeans for thirteen bucks that when I put them on, I swear, I heard a heavenly chorus. I've never had a pair of pants that fit so well. You KNOW it's a good pair, when you put on your previous 'favorite' pair and well, they just don't feel right.

I also picked up fabulous strapless party dress for New Years (which will also be wearable in the tropics) and a wicked cool Mad-Men style 50's secretary dress for work. Gotta work off some of my ass for it to fit properly, which I know goes against my thrift store shopping rules, but I really couldn't bypass this one. It was way too cute.

Awesome new years dress.  I don't care if I go out by myself, I'm going out in this.  Fuck you, New Years Eve.

Awesome 50's Madmen type office dress.  Little tight in the butt-area, but I'll get on that.

In other news, I started some new projects that will be getting added to the Etsy store when i get them done.  Awesome set of Johnny Cash coasters, and one of my friend's gave me an old mirror she had kicking around for the last four years or so.  On the way home from her place I was already thinking of things I could do with it, and it's coming along nicely.  I'll post pics when I get it done.. need some extra supplies before I can continue on it.

I really need to remember to get creative when I'm feeling like shit.  I was in such a crud mood yesterday but getting my hands dirty and listening to loud music just made everything go away.

Anyway, I'm off, dinner and movie night at my other friend's place tonight.  Looking forward to it, we haven't had much time to hang out with the holidays and all.

But I'm using my whole ass!

Lies.  No, I'm not.  Frankly, I'm a follower, and who doesn't want a donkey on their blog, at least once?  So a ala the Simple Dude, here is my half-assed weekend post.  Go visit Simple Dude and give him some love, since he has given me a donkey.

I'm attempting to scan some pics so I can list some new goodies on my Etsy store, 100 Watt Smirks.  My scanner is temperamental.  It was gifted to me by Lori at A Vintage Witch, which was super cool of her.  I wonder how many people I can pimp in one half-assed post.  However at some point in time one of the demon cats knocked the damn thing off the desk.  So now, mid-scan, it starts clicking and making godawful noises and I have to give it a good thump to get it back in order.  It still scans better than my craptacular HP 3-in-1.  Hewlett Packard, you suck.  I may keep an eye out for a nice little printer so I can get rid of the 3-in-1 completely because honestly, the thing is junk.  Trying to use the software grinds my entire system to a halt, which is a giant pain when all I want to do is resize a couple of pictures.

My campaign to win back @jplaskett to my Twitter-fold was an utter failure.  *sigh*  Not only did it not take off and become the internet meme of the decade, but it didn't even warrant a courtesy 'Will you STFU and leave me alone' follow.  Even Jann Arden threw me a bone, when I hinted.

Today is laundry day.  Taking kids to the Seventh circle of hell to get some Xmas portraits taken today.  Time to take this ass and put some pants on it.

Snowbound

I'm working from home today as I think I may have contracted pinkeye from my friend's child, and none of my co-workers need to catch that shit.  That's the logical conclusion I've reached, anyway, since i woke up this morning and my left eye was beet red, with some goo, and itchy as all hell.  (I think, if there is a hell, there'd be plenty of itching involved, as it's definitely one of the more irritating sensations one can have).

I've come to the conclusion that I love the idea of working from home, but in my current profession, the reality doesn't match the fantasy.  I miss the double screen at work, and in my wee cubicle, there's no piles of laundry and dirty floors mocking me.  Those are someone else' problem.  And it's a snow day, so the ladies are here, and unnaturally loud.  Distracting.

I set myself up my first Etsy Treasury yesterday.  I'm a bit of a comic nerd (not hardcore or anything.. my budget doesn't really allow for it) but I love stuff with superhero themes.  Go, look, comment, click on stuff.  Apparently the more comments, the more of a chance that it gets featured on the home page.  I'm at 15 clicks right now.

I've got a few things ready to list soon.  I'm going to try and list a bunch of stuff at the same time, as I don't find I get much traffic listing one or two things at a time.  I have two new switchplates, one featuring Deadpool and one made from an old cover of the cassette version of Guns N Roses Lies EP.  I haven't taken pictures of these yet. 

About a year ago I bought three small pier 1 frames at the Salvation army that I knew i could do something fun with.  Finally inspiration struck, and I came up with these:

I got the idea from www.latfh.com.  I'm hoping that having pimped their site, they'll hesitate before sending me out a cease and desist order like the one I received from the estate of Shel Silverstein.


It was fantastic staying in last Friday and just having a few glasses of wine and creating.  I have a few painting ideas, and some ideas for coaster sets.  I wish I had thought of this stuff before Christmas, but such is life.  Up goes the tree tonight.

This post is like me. Short and sweet.

So I'm doing a Facebook 30-day photo challenge and day 19 is a photo and a letter.  I enjoyed writing this so much I thought it'd make a fun blog post.

Dear Owner of this ginormous White Pickup Truck.

You don't know me. I don't know you. But I feel it is my duty as a fellow human being to let you know.. there is no more blatant way to advertise yourself as a douchebag redneck of epic proportion than to hang a pair of artificial testicles from the back of your giant redneck-mobile.

I can't even begin to describe all the different negative stereotypes that flood my brain when I see this kind of dumbassery. Uneducated, backwards, mysogynist, whiskey-swilling, wife-beating, date-rapin' sumbitch. Now, you may not be ANY of these things. But when you choose to hang a ballsack from the back of your truck, this is the impression that you are giving to at least ONE person, if not everyone.

Is that what you really want to project to those around you? I ask, because I care. And because everytime I see this, some small part of me wants to key your vehicle, just for fun.

Sincerely,
A concerned bystander.

**********************************

I'm frustrated right now, because part of me wants to paint, and another part wants to sleep.  I had such a horrible time waking up this morning.  It's winter at work.  I hit the snooze button 4,693 times it seemed, each time cursing it, cursing the snow, the cold, and just wanting to snuggle up inside my duvet and sleep.  It's still dark, frchristssake. Getting up without an alarm is such a luxury.

I haven't painted or made anything in a bit.  I'm feeling creative, but bogged down with just too much to do.  I'm not even in the holiday spirit.  This isn't my usual 'Bah Humbug' not-in-the-spirit type thing.  It just feels like an afterthought this year.  Like, 'Oh, yeah.  Christmas.  Right, I should get on that.'  I don't have my lights up or anything.  Just haven't really thought about it much.  

I'm determined to make some time for painting or something this weekend.  Just because.

Two movie reviews, a rant and an awesome link.

Just finished watching the second of two movies that a friend of mine burned a couple of weeks ago.  It's difficult finding time to do something as simple as watching a movie anymore but I got through them.  My thoughts:

The Runaways (B- oh, and my grading system is pretty arbitrary in case you were wondering)

Not a bad film, but of course with me, you can't go wrong with rock biopics.  It's the first time I've seen Kristen Stewart in a movie and I haven't wanted to punch her in the face, so good on her for that one.  I found her very believable as Joan Jett.  Let's put it this way.. with Dakota Fanning, I was watching Dakota Fanning play Cherie Curie, whereas I just felt like I was watching Joan Jett with Kristen's performance.

I had a hard time getting around the meta-teensploitation ick factor.  They're basically documenting how the Runaways as a band were exploited for their jailbait sex appeal by having Stewart and Fanning make out.  Weird.

That being said, I still thought it was a decent film.

The Trotsky (B)


First of all, since i first saw Highway 61 I've maintained that Canadian cinema is horribly under-rated.  Secondly, I'm officially adding Jay Baruchel to my list of awkward weedy shy-boy crushes. 
It was probably inevitable.  I thought the School admin's were a little too caricaturistically evil, since in real life a lot of teachers and principals are also pawns of the larger system.  But that didn't take away from my enjoyment.

Did I mention Jay Baruchel was fantastically awkward?  he may out-awkward Michael Cera.


So yeah, both pretty good films.  I saw the best friggin' thing on Etsy today.  I work in an office building that shares a parking lot with the Parole office (who have claimed about 15 reserved spots), a couple of smaller businesses and a Tim Hortons.  We have about 10 reserved spots, which was great when we had about 10 employees but now it's closer to 20, and we have to battle for spots.  So it's exceptionally frustrating when I come to work in the morning to this:

Or even more infuriatingly, this:

 

Okay, seriously Blogger and/or Tuxpaint?  That's supposed to say Asshole in Pickup truck.  FFS, people.

Anyway, I digress.. I've been looking for a nice passive-aggressive way to deal with this particular brand of jackass, and I think I may have found it:

Fuzzy Cute Bunnies with a Dark Side


Yes, ladies and gentlemen, handy little cards you can stick on someone's windshield just to let them know what a huge douche canoe they are for not being able to take a couple extra seconds to make sure other people have a place to park.

This may be the greatest thing ever.  Do Want.

Squeeeeee! and such - Follow Up

So yeah, here's the painting I talked about in a previous post.



I'm quite pleased with how it turned out.  She was happy with it as well.

I am vindicated.

Squeeeeee! and such.

Hehehe.. So, I paint, as you may know. Sometimes I'll start a project, find it a bit ambitious (as I am relatively new at this, having only picked up a brush for non-high-school-art-class purposes 3 or so years ago) and put it away to finish later. Sometimes these unfinished works get re-primed and recycled into new projects.

One such project was a portrait i started for a friend. I almost gave up on it, but tonight i decided to finish it, as she's coming to visit this weekend and I'm super excited after having not seen her for two years. A few years ago she sent me two beautiful charcoal portraits in a care package, and I think this painting is a nice way to reciprocate the gesture.

I'm quite excited by how it turned out. Naturally, I'm seeing the flaws, as I'm hyper-critical of myself, but I think she'll like it. I'll update with the final product after I've given it to her. No need to ruin the surprise.

These are the two portraits Sammi made for me, after another friend very helpfully decided to 'straighten' my picture frames.  Weirdo.

The third picture is a reproduction of the cover for Days of the New's first album, as done by a local artist as a wedding present for the ex-hubster and myself.  This woman is also wicked talented, specializes in celebrity portraits. Her house is literally covered in them.

Ain't got much to do, but there's always lots to say...

Holy wah, do I ever feel accomplished today. Five loads of laundry, cleaned the bathroom, moved the dryer back into the house, cleaned the fridge out, grocery shopped and succeeded in having the children help me by cleaning not only their room (as is expected on any given day) but also the living room and the mudroom. Got the bathroom done, but man.. my shower stall is craptacular and kind of gross. If I were planning to buy this place, I'd be ripping that sucker out.

Facebook's photo uploader is irritating me at the moment. I started uploading some pictures from Thursday night's Big Sugar concert about an hour and a half ago and it's still only uploaded five of them. *shakes fist*

Excellent show by the way. It was supposed to be the opening show for the Barrie New Music Festival. Yeah, the logic of kicking off a New Music Festival with a band that formed and was popular about 10-15 years ago kind of escapes me, but hey.. I'm not complaining.

However, if I was one of the other bands scheduled to play Thursday night I would be complaining, since they kind of got the short end of the stick in a time-slot the same as 'the big show'. As it was, there were two bands that I wanted to see that night as well, but ended up missing, the first being A Primitive Evolution, a group fronted by the wickedly talented Brett Carruthers who I went to public and high school with, and the second being the Schomberg Fair, whom I had the privilege of seeing earlier this summer and would happily see again.

Guys, consider this free promotion my apology for otherwise sucking and missing your shows. I held not the tickets.

The Trews opened the show, and I enjoyed them enough, considering I'm not a real big fan of theirs, and tend to file them in the same 'Schlock95' category as bands like Nickelback and Default. Okay, but nothing impressive. I wasn't terribly sad that we missed the first half of their quite long set.

The show took place at The Ranch, which as you may have guessed is a country bar, and I don't mean the good shit like Johnny cash and Patsy Cline. No no, it's that Alan Jackson Boot-Scootin' wal-mart country that generally makes my teeth itch. So generally if I am there, I am probably shit-faced since it's the only way I can handle being in that place for more than five minutes. It was nice to DD this night since they were NOT playing country. WHOO. It's unfortunate, because as far as bars go, it's HUGE and has a great layout. Oh, and Go-Go cages.

Go-Go cages, as it turned out, were a great way to reconcile my claustrophobia with my desire to actually SEE the band. I am short, and many people are not. I also like to dance but do not like to have my personal bubble invaded too much. So yay for the go-go cage.

So as I said, Big Sugar put on an excellent show. I remembered seeing them back in 1996 when not too many people knew who they were (with the exception of one of the guys in our party who has seen them somewhere in the ballpark of 40 times) and thinking they put on a very high-energy RAWK show. RAWWWWWKKKKKKK. They're also one of those bands that I always forget just how many songs of theirs I actually DO Know.

But yeah. Still waiting on photo uploads. Blargh. May paint tonight. I finished a tryptich based on three songs by Hawksley workman and I am quite pleased with how it turned out.


"Oh, You Delicate Heart", "Smoke Baby", and "Paper Shoes".

I need to organize my craft/art closet. I re-hung a cupboard door today, so I felt all cool and handy. Dad is coming tomorrow to help me finally fix the back-door knob before the snow flies.

I feel like going to look at my fridge again and marvelling at the clean-ness. G'night folks.